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Parenting with Lorraine
Written by Seoul Journal
A 30-year veteran Marriage Family and Child therapist, mother of five, and grandmother of 10, Lorraine Al-Jamie helps parents to acquire skills that enhance their ability to raise high-functioning and happy children.
The Terrible Twos and Adolescence
Although the terrible twos and adolescence seem far apart, they have much in common. Both are times when children feel a great need for autonomy. Since parents are well aware that children still need us to guide them, we cannot just throw our hands up and give them the freedom they want even though at times we may all be tempted to do so.
To help our children develop skills to become responsible adults, we must provide them with opportunities to make their own decisions whenever safe – and when the consequences of a wrong choice don’t overwhelm. This is the challenge. There is a fine line between deciding what consequence may be too hurtful and which not. It takes courage and faith for a mom or dad to watch their child do something that may cause them to fall down. But it is critical that we do just that so children can learn to be thoughtful and make wise decisions before the consequences become tougher as adults.
How we go about setting limits for our children also is critical. This depends on the age and emotional development of the child. Let us start with infancy. Until around two, babies are usually fairly compliant. And then what is often referred to as “the terrible twos” hits and parents don’t know what hit them. It is extremely important that parents don’t think of their children as being BAD. It is helpful if we view this stage as our child doing what he needs to, to learn more about how the world operates. He must push against limits to learn that they exist, and learn how to cope emotionally when he finds himself up against them.
Bullying
Written by Seoul Journal
A SUBJECT that unfortunately is on our minds today is bullying. Some children’s lives become a living hell because they’ve become the tar- gets of a bully or several bullies. Death is the outcome in extreme cases. It is not unknown for a victim to commit suicide to escape from bullying. It appears to me that the attack on this outrage must be two pronged. We must help the victim and protect him physically and psychologically. And we must realize that the bully also desperately needs our help.
Who can help? Many of us: the parents and family of the victim, the parents and family of the bully. Also teachers and educational administrators, coaches and other adult leaders plus anyone who witnesses an incident of bullying. It’s so natural and easy for passersby to not act by telling himself that it’s none of his business and that it is the responsibility of other adults to deal with the situation. But you cannot assume that someone else is going to rescue the child.
Parenting with Lorraine
Written by Seoul Journal
30-year veteran Marriage Family and Child Therapist and mother of 5 assists parents in acquiring skills that enhance their ability to raise high-functioning and happy children.
Respect
What outcome are we aiming for?
It is almost universally agreed that the most important job in the world is raising a child, and yet, it is often something we undertake without any preparation. Generally, we parent as we were parented and sometimes this leads to a positive outcome. However, we are not always clear about what outcome we are aiming for.
Blind obedience?
Do we want our children to be blindly obedient? In some cases, “yes.” For example when we shout “STOP” when our child is about to step into oncoming traffic without looking. But how about when we call them to come to us when they are in the middle of some task that is important to them? Are we willing to hear “just a minute, I’m playing a video game.” For some, that is a natural and acceptable response. For others it may feel like defiance. What makes for that difference in our reaction? Generally, it is in the tone of the relationship we have developed with that child.
Mutual respect
When we have built a relationship based on mutual respect and trust, we are much less likely to interpret our child’s response as defiance. For many it is a novel idea that “respect” is a quality that goes in both directions. We are likely to believe that our children owe us respect. We are less likely to understand that our children also want respect.
Saving Face in Korea
Written by Boyé Lafayette De Mente
Getting Along & Getting Things Done in Korea!
The Importance Of Saving Face in Korea!
Because of the importance of social class, rank and precise behavioral forms in pre-modern Korea all Koreans became incredibly sensitive about the behavior of others as well as their own actions because there were so many ways they could get into trouble.
Doing something that made someone else “lose face” or yourself losing face was not a trivial thing. It could be, and often was, disastrous—and it is still something that cannot be taken lightly.
This cultural factor gave birth to chae-myun (chay-me-yuun) or “face-saving” as one of the most important—and demanding—aspects of Korean life.
Through the Eyes of Yankelovich
Written by Seoul Journal
See how one of the world’s most influential people in public affairs, communications and public relations, Daniel Yankelovich, views the world.
A PROBLEM NOT CONFINED TO THE UNITED STATES
DEMOCRACIES with capitalist economic systems like those in Japan, the United States and Europe have many features in common. One is to compartmentalize thinking about the economy as if it were an autonomous system that operated in isolation of the larger society to which it belongs. Such thinking can lead to serious miscalculations of the sort that currently threaten the social contract that now prevails in the United States
Most economic theorists acknowledge that capitalism creates inequalities. This is a tradeoff that most Americans up to now have willingly accepted, despite the high value we place on equality. To reconcile the conflicting pulls of freedom and equality, Americans have settled on the principle of equality of opportunity as the underlying core value of democratic capitalism. Unfortunately, however, the traditional American value of seeking to “better oneself ” is beginning to show signs of erosion. This is because it is becoming increasingly difficult to realize.
Educating the World about the Deadly Danger of Food Allergies
Interview with Food Allergy Research & Education CEO John Lehr
Potentially deadly food allergies affect one in 13 children in the United States, or roughly two in every classroom. Food Allergy Research & Education (FARE) is a nonprofit organization that works on behalf of the 15 million Americans with food allergies, including those at the risk of life-threatening anaphylaxis (an extreme and often life-threatening allergic reaction to an antigen). Tokyo Journal International Editor Anthony Al-Jamie met with FARE CEO John Lehr.
TJ: Do you know what causes food allergies?
LEHR: Food allergies have been around for a long time. What’s unusual is the dramatic increase in industrialized or developed countries, as well as the increase in developing countries. In the United States, there are eight major food allergens [milk, eggs, fish, crustacean shellfish, tree nuts, peanuts, wheat and soybeans], but in countries like Japan, there is a specific food, soba noodles, that is more common as a food allergen than is common here, and in Israel, sesame is a very common allergy. If you ask the leading scientists at the National Institutes of Health in the United States what is causing the dramatic increase in food allergies, there are a lot of theories but no definitive answer. There are, I think, many implications. There is certainly a genetic component to it and there is an environmental component to it. In terms of research that we’re helping to support, we’re looking at a lot of twin studies, but there is a hygiene hypothesis, a vitamin-D hypothesis, cesarean VS natural birth....
A regular visitor to Tokyo, New York City-based Yoga Instructor and Interculturalist Judit Torok shares her techniques for alleviating big city stress.
Yoga for Everyone
I recently read an article about parents of elementary school children in California who were outraged about their children practicing Ashtangastyle yoga at school as part of their physical education program. They claimed that yoga is inappropriate and dangerous for kids because they believe their children are being indoctrinated into the Hindu religion in a public school. I couldn’t disagree with them more. These parents, and unfortunately many other people, hold inaccurate notions of this ancient practice.
The idea that yoga is a religious activity designed to worship Hindu deities is just one of the many misconceptions about it. People frequently associate yoga with Indian gurus with long beards, bead necklaces and white turbans. A more modern misperception is perpetrated by the media images of well-toned and attractive young people in eye-catching yoga poses captured generally on the beach with a beautiful sunset behind them or in a forest with a waterfall as the background. While purely religious sects of yoga do exist and there are expensive yoga retreats organized at Caribbean beaches, these are not the norm and instead obscure what I believe is yoga’s universal appeal.
LUXURIOUS ECO TOURISM
Written by Seoul Journal
Accessible only by floatplane, a luxurious floating lodge operates for four months a year in the heart of British Columbia’s Great Bear Rainforest, one of the last untouched corners of Canada – and the world.
King Pacific Lodge
Sustainable Luxury
How do you build a five-star hotel in one of the last untouched corners of the world without hurting the environment or building roads? Make it float. The King Pacific Lodge does just that. Owned by Hideo “Joe” Morita, son of the late Sony founder Akio Morita, the lodge operates for four months of the year from June to September. It is towed to and from its docking location 380 km north of Vancouver at the beginning and end of each season, and guests arrive by floatplane.
Irvine, California Mayor Steven Choi
Brings Work, Living and Play Together at Great Park
Steven Seokho Choi is the second Korean-born mayor of Irvine, California and the first Asian American to have been elected to a four-year term on the Irvine City Council. Holding a B.A. from Kyung Hee University in Seoul, South Korea, he earned his master’s degree in library science from Louisiana State University and his Ph.D. in library and information science from the University of Pittsburgh. He founded and serves as director of Dr. Choi’s Academy and has taught at University of Southern California, University of California Irvine, California State University Los Angeles, Henderson State University, Saddleback College and Coastline Community College. His political career began when he was elected to the Irvine Unified School District School Board in 1998 and was re-elected in 2002. He was then elected to the Irvine City Council in 2004. In 2012, Choi successfully ran for Mayor of Irvine and was re-elected in 2014. Seoul Journal's Executive Editor Anthony Al-Jamie met with Mayor Choi at Irvine City Hall.
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What to Eat
Written by Seoul Journal
The popularity of Korean food is spreading globally as it appeals to a wide range of tastes and offers diversity in its styles of cuisine. As all-natural ingredients are used to make the majority of Korean foods, many dishes have been praised for their health benefits, including vitamin-rich kimchi, which helps digestion and some say may help prevent cancer.
South Korean Exports Rising
Written by Seoul Journal
Car parts exports are outdoing exports of finished cars in South Korea. According to a recent article in Korea's leading newspaper, the Chosun Ilbo, the improved quality of Korean-made components and more overseas production by Korean conglomerates have attributed to the rise in exports of car parts that is up by 6% in 2013 over the previous year. This rise is nearly double of what the finished automobile industry has seen with their 3.1% increase. According to South Korea's Ministry of Trade, Industry and Energy, exports of car parts hit a new record in 2013 at 26 billion won. The Chosun Ilbo also recently reported that exports of IT parts are surging as domestic firms including Samsung boost the proportion of overseas production. In addition, last year exports of semiconductor chips hit a record of US$57.15 billion due to the growing demand in mobile devices.
Korean Band Fad Goes Global
Written by Seoul Journal
Asia’s Korean band fad is going global with top Western entertainment venues hosting performances by Korean dancers and musical artists.
K-Pop Goes the World
Surprising Attendance in California
The lights go on. The pounding dance beat starts. And 12,000 screaming fans rise to their feet in the Honda Center in Anaheim, California. Acclaimed record producer Quincy Jones watches from his suite. Is this Beyonce? Rhianna? Lady Gaga? Nope. It’s an all-star concert featuring the likes of Girls Generation, Super Junior, BoA, TVXQ, f(x), EXO and SHINee. How can bands not played on American Top 40 radio fill a U.S. arena? Well, these are Korea’s top pop bands, and they played S.M. Entertainment’s third world tour on May 20, 2012. SME, a Seoul-based independent record producer, has held previous world tours with stops in New York, Los Angeles, Paris, Tokyo, Shanghai, Beijing and Taipei. Yeah, but was Anaheim’s Honda Center filled with 12,000 Koreans and Korean Americans? Nope. Around two thirds of the fans were non- Korean, a sign of the spreading popularity of Korean pop.
Click here to see a Photo Gallery of the SM Town World Live III Concert in Anaheim, California
YouTube Sensations
If K-Pop music isn’t being played on the radio, how are fans discovering these acts? YouTube. An unlikely emergent is called “Psy.” He is a flabby, middle-aged looking guy, who with his “horsey dance”, came out of nowhere and took the world by storm in 2012. At the time of print, he had the most watched and most liked YouTube video of all time with over 815 million views and the Guinness World Record for breaking 2.9 million “likes” on YouTube with “Gangnam Style.” Psy knocked viral legends such as Rebecca Black and Lady Gaga down the charts in his international hit count, and became the #1 downloaded song on iTunes. No wonder Schoolboy Records (the label of Justin Bieber’s manager Scooter Brown) signed him. Korea’s JoongAng newspaper has reported that K-Pop videos on YouTube were viewed nearly 2.3 billion times from 235 countries in 2011, three times more than the previous year’s record of 800 million views. The majority of clicks were from Japan with 423 million, followed by 240 million views in the U.S., 220 million in Thailand, 180 million in Taiwan and 170 million in Vietnam. But is K-pop growing outside Asia and the U.S.? Interestingly enough, the United Arab Emirates and Kuwait brought in 4.8 million and 1.7 million views, respectively.
Heart and Seoul
Written by Seoul Journal
Add a little spice to your life with a trip to South Korea- by Michael CurrenLooking for a getaway? Need to add a little flavor in your life without spending half of your vacation and budget on an airplane? In approximately 2 hours from the time you depart Haneda Airport and for the cost comparable to the bullet train between Tokyo and Osaka, you can be arriving in the heart of Seoul - a city filled with excitement, shopping, nightlife, and a whole lot more. Although the differences in culture between Korea and Japan may seem subtle at first glance, a couple of days in Seoul can be stimulating and refreshing. Whether you are after the spicy food, the warm culture, the hot nightlife or an invigorating esthetic scrub down, a visit to Seoul is sure to stimulate your senses. |
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Where to StayThe following are two of the top hotels in Seoul ideal for both business and leisure travelers. Both hotels feature English and Japanese speaking staff. |
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